Ensure that you are dicing your onyo correctly

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  1. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    jean pierre can go suck a million hairy dicks

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      There's nothing I hate more than some dipshit on the internet telling me that I've been doing something basic wrong my entire life. It works just fine you overreaching homosexual. Leave me alone.

      You’re completely moronic, this is the only way to chop an onion. I’ve worked in restaurants for 30 years and even your basic groid brained morons can figure this out. Just admit you don’t know how to cook.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Poe's law moment.
        I tend to think you're actually serious.
        Hard to believe people like you really exist in the world. Actual NPCs.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        I'm in favor of the lateral cuts, whats your problem

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      He can and he will.

  2. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    There's nothing I hate more than some dipshit on the internet telling me that I've been doing something basic wrong my entire life. It works just fine you overreaching homosexual. Leave me alone.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >It works just fine you overreaching homosexual.
      Except it doesn't do anything.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      There's nothing I hate more than someone so unable to tolerate criticism that even something as mild as "Don't do this" (because it literally does nothing) gets them to throw a little fit.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Don't make posts like this anon. It's actually a very ineffective way to get your intentions across and makes you look like a seething moron.

  3. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    i only started cutting my onion like that a couple days ago after seeing it done for ages. now i want to figure out how to make garlic chopping more efficient

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      smash and rock.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      If you smash it you don't need to chop it finely.
      If you need it really fine, then use a garlic press.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Just microplane garlic, takes seconds and it's way easier to clean than a press

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Cowflop. I run several heads per day through an OXO.I press then flip out the emptied husk in a coupla seconds with a full butterknife. Finished, I rinse the press under fast hot water then store it. Let the processed garlic sit for 20 or more minutes so the enzymes do their nutritional work. Easy peasy.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      I smash, chop and then sprinkle a bit of salt and press it with the flat of the blade into a paste. Smashing just gets it out of the paper and the rest is like 10 seconds at most and you get garlic that essentially dissolves as it hits the pan.

      [...]
      You’re completely moronic, this is the only way to chop an onion. I’ve worked in restaurants for 30 years and even your basic groid brained morons can figure this out. Just admit you don’t know how to cook.

      I guess you don't know the Marco Pierre White onion chop, he's right about this not being a good enough dice, the texture this chope produces is awful.

  4. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    i just slam my knife at it till its finely chopped

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Same here. It feels good not having to work in a kitchen professionally and knowing I can chop up my food as moronicly as I want and nobody can stop me.

  5. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    For a very long time I did what is in OP's pic, but I always wondered what the point of the horizontal cuts were, given that the onion is already segmented into different layers. After seeing some tv show from the 90s w/ Jacque Pepin saying that there's no point to the horizontal cuts, I stopped making them except for when I am *very* finely dicing an onion. I have noticed no difference in dishes for anything that calls for rough- or medium-chopped onions.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >After seeing some tv show from the 90s w/ Jacque Pepin saying that there's no point to the horizontal cuts
      can you find it again? I literally started doing it after seeing pepin do it that way
      and youre telling me there is nothing wrong with the red pieces here?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >pier
        My bad, it was Jean-Pierre, not Jacque Pepin ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CwRttSfnfcc ).

        As I said, for fine-dicing, I still make the lateral/horizontal cuts, but for a mirepoix or something that I'm going to be having on the stove for hours, I don't bother anymore.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >As I said, for fine-dicing, I still make the lateral/horizontal cuts, but for a mirepoix or something that I'm going to be having on the stove for hours, I don't bother anymore.
          I missed that part, fair enough

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Knives don't work that way. I've literally never seen a knife in my entire life capable of cutting an onion in this fashion.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >perfectly minced
          >huge rectangular strips clearly visible
          Gaslighting bastard. Why not spend 30 more seconds on a few horizontal cuts for a more uniform result?

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >for a more uniform result
            To what benefit? Do you want all your food to taste like pre-digested gruel, or do you want a little variety in each bite?

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              Diced onion is usually a flavor base that is supposed to disappear behind the central ingredients.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                um...

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                "Usually" means "in the majority of cases," but, yes, in the majority of exceptions such as that one it is even more important to be approximately uniform.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Onyo tastes good in whatever sizes. It's called wabi-sabi.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous
        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous
          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Tennō(nion)heika Banzai!

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          If you want to be really autistic about it, you can do this but with the focal point below the table, so you don't cut the center in 1 millions tiny pieces

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            this is literally what i kind of just did naturally after cutting a few onions and trying to do it better

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            The onion is going to fall apart.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          this just seems like a pain in the ass

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Couldn't you just use one of these and simply turn the onion after slicing it once?

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              that's an egg slicer, it won't work on an onion.
              mandolin or food processor are the only worthwhile ways to cut onions that don't involve just doing it with a knife.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                You'd obviously need blades instead of wires.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous
        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          way more effort than just doing a few horizontal cuts

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          https://i.imgur.com/R17GDtq.png

          What's the point of this?

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            to get the most evenly sized pieces. for cooking uniformity and presentation.

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              Except both of those radial cutting methods will result in uneven bits of onyo.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                the point is coming up with a method that results in the most evenly sized pieces with a reasonable amount of effort, not perfect uniformity.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                So you admit you don't care about perfectly evenly sized pieces?

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                yeah? i'm not autistically cutting every individual onion ring into perfect pieces. there's a trade off between effort and uniformity. the second radial method is a decent compromise.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                You need to peel each layer of the onion and lay it out flat on your cutting board. Then you can easily chop it into pieces of the same size.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                I use a food processor to reduce my onions to a thin paste which I then pour into brunoise-shaped molds.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                underrated

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          anyone that says this is hard shouldn't be using a knife. I've seen every manner of moron culinary graduate theory out there. This is the way to do it, if you don't suck

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          https://i.imgur.com/11NEMdY.jpg

          sugoku basado onion senpai

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          I don't really get the point of doing this. You still get differently sized pieces this way because the outer layers are longer. Regular vertical slices are easier if you don't care about having a variety of sizes and if you really need the pieces to be as uniformly sized as possible the horizontal + vertical grid pattern works better.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Woah…holy onions…

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        This, l forgot to make the horizontal slice a couple of weeks are and had to throw away the whole stew.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      I stopped doing those horizontals after I cut myself and haven't gone back. It's unnecessary.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Cutting yourself is unnecessary I'd focus on not doing that

  6. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Just use a chopper

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      You're gonna love my nuts!

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Every time I've ever used one of these they were dull as frick and never chopped anything and just mashed it all until I stopped

  7. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    The horizontal cut is a meme chef's use to see who is really a chef, and who just follows directions. Anyone who actually knows what they are doing knows it's a pointless step in dicing onions. It's the same prank that gets pulled at jobs when someone tells someone to get them an ID10T form from HR. Or when people say to mix baking soda and vinegar to make a cleaner.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >Or when people say to mix baking soda and vinegar to make a cleaner.
      People on reddit almost universally state that they do this when cleaning their stainless cookware. They hear people recommending to use vinegar, and they hear people recommending to use baking soda. They don't understand you just pick one or the other and that mixing them defeats the purpose of using a corrosive cleaner.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Off-topic, but I am contractually obligated to shill for Barkeeper's Friend in this situation.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          thank you for the advice, but sadly i have a moral obligation to report you for advertising
          stay well anon

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            The vinegar lobby takes another scalp.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            You too, fren! Nice working with you!

  8. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I quarter onions so I don't have to cut horizontally. First
    |
    | |
    | | |
    then rotate and
    |_|_/
    |_|/
    |/
    for each quarter.

    Either that or I cut it in my hand. I make shallow crosscuts into it, then rotate the onion in my hand as I slice into the onion from its side and directly into the pan.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      I’m not really understanding what all the underscores and slashes mean. Is it robot code? Did Chat GPT write your post for you?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >on Culinaly
        >cannot into ASCII
        how far we have fallen

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Can you? Are the two oblong triangles with text in the middle supposed to be a pictogram of a wedge you cut from an onion? Or are you trying to illustrate your cutting motion with each vertical line representing a vertical cut? You appear to be too stupid to have a conversation with (more than a standard deviation difference in IQ).

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            It's trivially obvious what that's supposed to represent.

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              Share with the class, Dexter.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                Seriously dude? As described, a quarter of an onion being sliced vertically, then the same quarter of an onion rotated 90˚ and sliced vertically again. As shown by the fact that the first wedge only has cuts going one direction, and the second wedge has cuts going two perpendicular directions. The mass of the onion is represented entirely by the diagonal slashes and the negative space within them.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Then think of it like this:

            Cut 1:
            |
            | |
            | | |

            Now, turn the quarter of onion over 90 degrees and cut parallel to the first cuts

            Cut 2:
            |_|_/
            |_|/
            |/

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              I'm so confused. Six vertical and 3 slanted cuts are all one cut?

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                No.
                >get onion
                >remove top from onion
                >remove skin from onion
                >remove the outermost bit of the root-end from onion
                >quarter the onion through the root-end do that the quarters will hold together
                >*place an onion quarter flat-side down on the cutting board because you clearly need every step explained to you in excruciating detail
                >slice vertically into the onion quarter
                >rotate the onion quarter into the other flat side
                >slice vertically into the onion quarter
                >slice vertically into the onion quarter perpendicularly to the first two sets of slices to cut onion into pieces
                >repeat from * for each of the the the other remaining quarters
                I can do an onion in half a minute or so. Not the speediest time but it works well without having to do horizontal cuts.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                >>get onion
                no cut
                top from onion
                curved cut
                skin from onion
                curved cut
                the outermost bit of the root-end from onion
                straight cut
                the onion through the root-end do that the quarters will hold together
                straight cut (x2)
                >>*place an onion quarter flat-side down on the cutting board because you clearly need every step explained to you in excruciating detail
                no cut
                vertically into the onion quarter
                straight cut
                the onion quarter into the other flat side
                rotated cut
                vertically into the onion quarter
                straight cut
                vertically into the onion quarter perpendicularly to the first two sets of slices to cut onion into pieces
                perpindicular(???) cut
                from * for each of the the the other remaining quarters
                star cuts

                Still does not explain the attempted ascii "art"

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                You are not very smart

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >Either that or I cut it in my hand.
      AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        What? I have literally never cut myself with a knife. Weirdly, I've cut myself with scissors and even one of those super sharp KuhnRikon peelers but never a knife.

  9. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I just chuck the onion in the chopper and pass by all you tards. I have all my food in the pan and you are still fiddling around with dicing. What a waste of time, I can't believe I didn't do this sooner

  10. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    if Chef Jean Pierre says it - it's fact
    any other opinion is that of a troony

  11. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I still do the horizontal cuts. My cooking skills are dogshit and doing it this way lets me get more consistent results than any other method. Those with IQs above 90 can probably skip it.

  12. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    James Alt says that the horizontal cut is mathematically proven to be the best way to cut onion

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Wrong.

      Then think of it like this:

      Cut 1:
      |
      | |
      | | |

      Now, turn the quarter of onion over 90 degrees and cut parallel to the first cuts

      Cut 2:
      |_|_/
      |_|/
      |/

      /

      I quarter onions so I don't have to cut horizontally. First
      |
      | |
      | | |
      then rotate and
      |_|_/
      |_|/
      |/
      for each quarter.

      Either that or I cut it in my hand. I make shallow crosscuts into it, then rotate the onion in my hand as I slice into the onion from its side and directly into the pan.

      is best.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      anytime James Alt says something you know it's the most aggressively autistic option and can be safely ignored since its advantages are at best marginal

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >I ignore him because he is right
        is this what it's like inside the mind of a moron?

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          There is no "right" and wrong here. We're talking about cutting onions, not solving equations. Get off your wooden high horse, you're making an absolute ass out of yourself when you say shit like that.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            3/10 you got me to reply

  13. 2 months ago
    Poor Investor

    'nion

  14. 2 months ago
    Anonymous
  15. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >cut out stems
    >yank off peel
    >slice in half while yelling “JAWSOME” because street sharks are cooler than ninja turtles
    >forget which way I was supposed to cut it, whatever, start chopping
    >magically get just the right size onyo pieces because my ancestors guide my blade
    >chop up hell pepper (red bell pepper, but cooler) whilst yelling “THE POWER TO BE…MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE”
    >magically becomes the right size pieces because ancestors
    >chop up lame ass green bell pepper also because reasons whatever frick it
    >chop up celery after eating half of it and getting distracted by another spiritual battle with judaic daemons trying to eat my soul
    >fend them off with shrimp and crawfish tails, celery magically becomes just the right size to accompany onyo into the skillet
    People think about this shit way too hard. Just channel your chi or use the kaioken or whatever.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      gumBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

  16. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Only do one horizontal towards the bottom so I don't get them big chunks. Anything else is a waste of time and effort.

  17. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    worms in my onyo?

  18. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >horizontal cuts are… le bad!!
    >u-um, i’m not wrong, i just meant angled cuts are better and forgot to bring it up!!
    Why do every one of these threads go like this? Make up your fricking mind—these are two different arguments. Also anyone that says to go vertical -> horizontal is a cooklet. The vertical cuts frick up the structural integrity too much to do horizontal cuts second.

  19. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    you all need to learn from a professional

  20. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    If you want a medium/ large dice, don't slice it down the middle.
    If you want a small dice, slice it down the middle.

    Typically I use a larger dice for onions that I cook and a small dice for raw.

  21. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    what's the point in horizontal cuts, if you can turn the onion 90 degrees and get the same result with vertical cuts? or not?

  22. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >get 10 lbs of onions
    >peel back outer layers on all of them
    >cut them all in half
    >place one half at a time under my manual dicer (I get big white onions and they're too large to fit if left whole)
    >dice it a few times
    >repeat until all onions are diced
    >refrigerate about a pound of onions because that's how much I'll use in a week, if I know I'll be cooking something using more onions than usual put more in the fridge
    >put the rest in the freezer and use as needed
    The dicer is a pain in the ass to clean but it is easier and quicker than using a knife so I get my money's worth by dicing enough onions to last me awhile on a lazy Sunday afternoon

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Imagine being so lazy that you pre dice and freeze your onions...

      You are worse than people who buy jars of minced garlic

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >reduce frequency of washing my dicer, which again is a pain in the ass, from once every week to once every couple months
        >dicer is much quicker per onion than I am dicing with a knife
        >zero decrease in the quality of my onions, throw them frozen onto a skillet or into the oven and they're fine
        What seems to be the problem?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      interesting how are the onions when you defrost them?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        If they're getting cooked I just add them into the skillet or oven still frozen. They thaw very quickly once they're cooking. The finer they're diced the quicker they thaw. I cook them the exact same way as I would fresh onions and you can't tell any difference.

        I usually only eat raw onions on sandwiches or salads so what I'll do is move a small amount of frozen onions to the fridge each week and let them thaw in there. Those will be my raw onions. If I only have frozen onions available but I still want them on a sandwich guess I'm having sauteed onions for that sandwich.

  23. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    i only cut onions in very thin slices to avoid this bullshit

  24. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    *obliterates your chopping technique*

  25. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    You DICE your onions? What are you, some royals or chefs of some dictators?

    Whats next? Fricking snobs..

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