>go to chipotle and get a burrito with chips and guac and a fountain drink

>go to chipotle and get a burrito with chips and guac and a fountain drink
>feel like i've been hit by a tranquilizer dart
why does eating here make you so goddamn sleepy

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  1. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I stopped going to chipotle when some guy broke into my car and sprayed piss all over the interior
    I found the guy and reported him and called chipotle and they were like, "Yeah, we know the piss guy, sorry he pissed your car, but we won't share other cases with you" so the police couldn't do frick all and I had to auction my car, got like $350 for it

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      remind me of the serial pooper in ohio
      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bowel_Movement_Bandit

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >firefighter
        Figures. The Chipotle Pisser was a Marine with a fricking hybrid with "thank me for my service" bullshit they can't all be good

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        why is he called a bandit when the article doesn't mention that he stole anything?

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          I don't know anon.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          he stole the innocence of car interiors

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Why have I seen so much crazy shit out of Akron lately. Between Cyraxx and this shit im not sure its even a real place.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      thanks for the P. Shack
      t. dirty Mike & the boys

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >that burrito
      May as well just stick with hot pockets at this point, i miss when chipotle was good

      Just air it out and hit it with Nature's Miracle Piss Stink Remover, way cheaper than getting a new car. Based guy though

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        I had another car I didn't need it

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      That's what u get for going to chipotle

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        No shit, I stopped going

  2. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    All the carbs spikes your blood sugar.

  3. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    It's the carbs anon.
    Ever notice how they pile on metric dick loads of rice?
    The chips are carbs, the burrito is carbs, the rice is carbs.
    I never get rice on my burritos if I do go to Chipotle. I'm a strictly double-meat, cheese, and sour cream enjoyer. Even if it costs more.
    Besides, Qdoba's breakfast burritos are superior in every way and cheaper too.

  4. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Because if you eat a burrito, a bag of chips, a bowl of guacamole, and a soda, you've just eaten an entire day's worth of calories in a few minutes.

    Digestion uses up energy in proportion to the amount of food you've eaten, and there's a lag between the start of the digestive process and the replenishment of energy from the food you're digesting. If you eat a sufficiently large meal, it will knock you on your ass. It's like when a lion gobbles up half a gazelle and just spends the rest of the day sleeping in the sun.

  5. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >why does eating here make you so goddamn sleepy
    You probably suffer from anemia. Your blood isn't capable of doing its jobs AND transporting enough oxygen to keep you awake.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      nta but frick is that what I have?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Possible. I had anemia and it was really bad. But I also have dysautonomia even without anemia. Sometimes after eating I'd be nodding like someone on opiates.

  6. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >tortilla burrito, probably with rice
    >tortilla chips
    >soda

    Hmm idk OP, probably because you eat like a child. You moronic fat frick

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Why is half of this sub proana psychos? Go to fit.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Very good bait style, I like this. Subtle and tasteful, I almost went for it. Using an overtly, aggressively stupid message distracts at first glance from the otherwise glaringly obvious redditgayging. That is to say: don't go back. Stay anon, I like you.

  7. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I still remember the first time I ate at Chipotle. That was the day I became a man. Not even 12 hours later, blood started dripping out of my butt and I knew that I had become a real man. My first period.
    That was truly a milestone that I will always remember and cherish.

  8. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    It's the reason why Mexicans are so lazy and why their food is so bad.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous
  9. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    The oil they use in everything is bran oil. It's synthetically extracted and refined from bran husks. Your body isn't trained to digest bran oil in the large quantities fed you and separated from the bran itself. Chipotle uses it because on paper it has a healthy profile, "vegan" and a high smoke point. But when it lands in your stomach the organ rebels an you feel queasy and lethargic. Except for the bran oil, Chipotle could be a really healthy place to eat.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Interesting. I always thought it was insulin spike like another anon said from the carbs but i never get sleepy when i eat pasta and i drank a 20oz orange crush with a pizza the other day and felt fine. Maybe it is the oil?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      citation needed

  10. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Imagine willingly paying extra for guac, chipotle is a scam for low IQ morons

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