mishaps

>juice a bunch of lemons
>make a gallon of lemonade in a glass pitcher
>immediately drop it on the stove
>lemonade and glass everywhere
what's your worst Culinaly accident

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  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >make sausage gravy in crock pot
    >hear a noise
    >get nervous and put the crock pot in cabinet to protect it from burglars
    >forget all about it
    >open cabinet again 3 months later
    >mfw

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      thats one of the dumbest things ive ever read anon, im proud of you

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      damn gravy burglars

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous
    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Damn that's why I couldn't find your gravy
      Don't worry. I'll check there next time

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Anon, I think burglars stole your face!

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      are you from ukraine too

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      How tf did you not smell it??

      • 4 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Crockpot lids seal well except for the small vent hole on top

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    came home drunk and saw a chocolate cake sitting on the kitchen table. I just grabbed handfuls of it and ate it like a literal tard. there was a trail of cake from the kitchen to my room downstairs. I forgot that it was my sister's birthday the next day and that was for her

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      fricking kek

      https://i.imgur.com/fzHdy3s.png

      >juice a bunch of lemons
      >make a gallon of lemonade in a glass pitcher
      >immediately drop it on the stove
      >lemonade and glass everywhere
      what's your worst Culinaly accident

      I was trying to make cold noodle salad last weekend and accidentally put a pound of pasta down my sink drain when the colander tipped over

  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous
    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      FRICK ANIME!!!!

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      GOOD.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        FRICK ANIME!!!!

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Probably fricking up a pasta sauce with conchiglie, the sauce was lumpy and grainy, disgusting, it all went into the bin.

      Blessed post by a blessed person

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      = /

      = )

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I really don't have one I can think of but my dad nearly burned our house down frying fish on the stove and forgetting about it. All the kitchen walls were smut black, it got so hot in the it melted the window blinds and the plastic on the stove and fricked up the floor somehow too.

    But thats not the worst part, he never fixed any of it even though hes been a construction worker for like 40 years at that point. So I spent most my life with no kitchen. We washed our dishes in the 2nd bathroom. The house is still like this to this day like 16 years later.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Kek what a blue collar slob, I bet if he wasn’t a construction worker it would be fixed by now

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Sorry you had an abusive father anon

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    i was visiting my grandparents and wanted to make them some baked fish for dinner. 325 for 20 minutes sounded good to me.
    i did not know their oven defaulted to celsius instead of fahrenheit. the disgusting smell of smoldering fish mixed with flaming parchment paper and smoke was not pleasant. coincidentally, that was the first time i used a fire extinguisher. needless to say, we ended up ordering a pizza.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Are you in the USA or euro and didn’t convert the recipe ?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Why would an oven even go up to 325 celsius? That's like 600° in real money.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        i think it defaulted to broil because i set the temperature so high

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >salt a bunch of high quality ribeye
    >stick in oven to come up to room temp and not be out just sitting in the open air on a counter top
    >time goes by
    >”hm I want baked potato too guess I’ll preheat the ol oven..”
    >crank it up to like 450
    >light some charcoal drink a beer pass some time go back inside
    >”damn something smells delicious!”
    >”OH FRICK”
    Still managed to get a badass reverse sear on them but yeah they were well past medium well

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    one time i put my hot pockets in the microwave for too long and one of them burst 🙁

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      ):

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    the first time I tried to make bread I was too stubborn to heed every instructions' warnings and just had to prove for myself that "flour is sticky when mixed with water." just kept on working it more and more thinking maybe it would unstick when mixed enough. unsurprisingly, it didn't. ended up with two dough boxing gloves that I could only separate by running my hands under the sink for five minutes

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      I was making dough recently and needed it to be on the sofer side, so I kinda overdid it with the water and ended up wasting like 20m adding more flour little by little while my hands were completely doughgloved. Eventually I got impatient and just tossed an extra half cup and it turned out perfectly fine
      This was what I made out of it btw
      It's with goat&sheep feta cheese, a hint of ricotta for a bit of flavor variety, and a tiny amount of spinach. I didn't get enough spinach, so I had my cousin, whom I was making the thing for, dig through a spring mix bag and pick out all the spinach leafs to boil just to have a bit extra

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Dropped a hot chicken pot pie on my foot and got a pretty gnarly burn.

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I made some rotini with meat balls the other night.
    I made 6 meat balls.
    I ate the first 5 meat balls without incident, but I dropped the 6th one on the floor.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >That pic
      TV used to be soo much fun

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        we still have lots of fun

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >I dropped the 6th one on the floor.
      why does this make me so sad
      but if it were me i probably would've shamelessly eaten it off the floor

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        it's the last one.
        there were no more to look forward to

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >eaten it off the floor
        it fell on my living room rug which I haven't vacuumed all year. it got all hairy (the meatball)

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Made a whole stockpot full of tuber and chicken soup. Reach the final stage before adding chicken and whip out my mom's immersion blender from the 80s. It explodes into a million tiny plastic shards into the soup.

    She now has a decent one from Braun and I refuse to ever use other people's aged equipment ever again.

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >Making a brownie tempura
    >Make it well enough
    >cut it in half
    >I was using a curved knife so my hand slides off the curved edge and slices my thumb open
    >Go to the kitchen first aid box
    >no band aids
    >no bandages
    >wrap my thumb in paper towels
    >Squeeze it and sit by the sinks feeling sorry for myself
    >Entire kitchen shuts down for the night
    >Go home and my gf asks why I'm home so early

    At least I got a few days off to heal

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Prööh :=====e

  13. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >work six days in a row twelve hour shifts, exhausted
    >have next three days off
    >instacart delivered ribeye, mushrooms, and fries
    >box of wine already sitting on nightstand
    >konosuba queued up in mpc on the tv
    >pregamed on an empty stomach, now to cook and pass out
    >steak finishes perfect medium rare
    >mushrooms halved and fried with whole stick of butter
    >so many fries I need a second plate
    >can't get in bed and eat fast enough
    >not even two bites in hear daytime roober in kitchen knocking shit over
    >tactically approach kitchen gun in hand
    >roober cast darkness, can't see shit
    >spend next ten months in cheap hotel with ass kitchenette

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      What the frick

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous
        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          Huh?

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Huh?

  14. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I spilt an entire aeropress brew on/in my white cabinets.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      and then you simply wiped it off without issue?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Mostly. It got in hard to reach places, so it was tedious. I made another coffee first.

        • 4 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          Nice 🙂

  15. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    On my birthday I got really drunk and made a lamb chop. The plate was too close to the edge of my computer desk and flipped the plate into my lap and then the lamb chop fell on the floor and the plate broke 🙁

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      ):

      i was making a grilled cheese, and in the process got the cheese all over the pan, burnt all the seasonings i put on the bread, and soaked the bottom layer bread when i was trying to steam the cheese. still tasted good once i managed to fry off the wetness

      Hey gordon

  16. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    i was making a grilled cheese, and in the process got the cheese all over the pan, burnt all the seasonings i put on the bread, and soaked the bottom layer bread when i was trying to steam the cheese. still tasted good once i managed to fry off the wetness

  17. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >what's your worst Culinaly accident
    shattered a bowl of dough that i was proofing for the whole day

  18. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >start a thicc steak on the stovetop to sear it
    >transfer the stainless pan to the oven to finish
    >smells delicious
    >can't wait to eat it
    >reach into the oven and grab the handle of the pan
    >hear the flesh of my hand sizzling
    >forgot the ove glove
    >really bad burn on my left hand, couldn't use it for weeks
    >left hand was, at the time, my jerking off hand
    >steak was still delicious

  19. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I can think of two
    > making shrimp stock by boiling shrimps shells in a pot of water
    > tastes and smells delicious
    > ok time to strain the stock
    > brain defaults to pasta straining
    > pour the entire stock down the sink
    > left looking at a colander of boiled shells
    > just sat there and for a solid minute staring at my moronicness
    Second one
    > high as kite and getting hungry
    > pop a frozen lasagna in the oven
    > fricking 75 minute cooking time
    > time to take it out of the oven
    > grab the aluminum tray it came in with one oven mitt
    > the entire tray warps and lasagna spills all over the inside of the oven door and into the crack
    > frick me
    > scoop up what can be recovered and still eat it

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      shit, at least you got these funny stories to tell now anon

    • 4 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >> ok time to strain the stock
      >> brain defaults to pasta straining
      >> pour the entire stock down the sink
      Frick I've done that before

  20. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >Be me, 10/11
    >Come home from school and hungry
    >no one home
    >pickup a can of alphabet soup
    "Cook in 3 minutes"
    >attempt to take the lid off but struggle halfway so just shove the can in for 3 minutes
    >mfw i come rushing into the kitchen 10 seconds later and see blue sparks flying inside the microwave
    >push the button to cancel and open the door before kitchen explodes
    >Tell parents later that evening, they just laugh it off.

    aside from pouring boiling water on my leg and leaving it there for 20 minutes after tying to washing a bowl at a scout camp I think that's my worst

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      > Be me, 10/11
      No way you’re that attractive

  21. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >dad gifts me a cast iron
    >use it twice, last time was for a ribeye
    >forget about it
    >during depressive episode, let it sit at the bottom of a sink for six months
    >finally clean everything up but there is some weird mold on the pan
    >just put it in a garbage bag
    >five years later, bring it with me on two moves
    >still in that garbage bag in my garage

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      That's fixable, anon. Steel wool and elbow grease (and maybe Barkeepers Friend too) will strip whatever it is right off that cast iron and leave you with a nice clean pan you can re-season and start using. Just be sure to wear gloves because the combination of the steel wool and the Barkeepers Friend will frick your hands all up.

  22. 4 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Wanted to make gravy for thanksgiving as a kid but I didn't actually know how to properly make gravy. Made a good roux from drippings and butter, thinned it out with stock, then decided to make more of it by just adding more drippings and flour and stirring it around. It ended up being a greasy, awful mess that I was awkwardly trying to drain the grease off at the dinner table. No one said anything but I felt real bad about it.

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