shhhh...?

I add a shot of my tequila stash to my iced tea when my wife isn't looking.

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  1. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >when my wife isn't looking
    why? what is she going to do about it?

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      >go berserk
      >call him a drunk
      >threaten to call the cops on him for being drunk
      That's what my mom does, at least. Also, I'm 32 and wish I was dead.

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Maybe if you weren't a 32 year old alcoholic living with his mom she might loosen up

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          my mom and I used to get wasted until she passed away. Not even my homosexual brothers would drink with us because their wives wouldn't let them. I also used to beat my wife if she ever made a face if we didn't have diapers or formula due to our drinking

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            >I also used to beat my wife if she ever made a face
            Did she smarten up and stop complaining or leave like a b***h?

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              she was packing her backs one time and I stopped her and told her that I love her and I would never do it again while I kissed and had sex. Seem they get off on lies and deception

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      good question, she's okay with me having a few beers, doesn't say much, the shots of tequila might raise an eyebrow though.

  2. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I bet she gets good and nice after that, but don't admit anything.
    FYC

  3. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I don't wash my tasting spoon when cooking nearly as often as I should

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      According to biden that's a felony!

  4. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    If I offer food to someone then I practiced safe cooking at levels beyond most restaurants.

    If I cook for myself I don't wash my hands, 5 second rule for shit that falls, usually drunk/high, and I often smell the sweat on my balls. Ball sweat adds umami.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Good GOD man. What the frick is wrong with you? wash your goddamn wiener.

  5. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    What do I do if my wife can't help herself but eat cookies and drink sugary drinks around the house?

    I don't buy any junk food myself but around the holidays or something usually we'll get chocolates and whatnot and not a day goes by when she won't indulge. I can have sweets in the house for weeks before I finally finish them but she eats them all within a couple days. I feel like I have to hide them like she's a child or something and I feel so stupid for it. I guess my secret is I hide junk food from my wife for her own good.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Maybe it’s just me but after starting to eat a few dates every day my sugar cravings almost completely disappeared. Alternatively I’m not suggesting food poisoning, but people become hesitant to eat foods that have made them sick (knockoff samoas upset my tummy if I eat too many).

      Also it’s not really shameful but my secret is I don’t really get angry except when I’m cooking, but when I’m cooking I swear up a storm (no I’m not a chef/cook for my job).

  6. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    i eat and use food that falls on the floor all the time if its in my own home
    even if something falls on the filthy table outside, its getting picked up and eaten

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      i saw my mom accidently drop burger patties into the compost bucket when she was dumping the grease out. she scraped the food scraps off it and put it back into the pan

  7. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >when my wife isn't looking

    Anon, she knows you have an alcohol problem. She's in the final stages of preparing to take the kids and go stay at her mothers whilst your're at work. You're going to lose the house in the divorce. she's going to take everything. Now is the time to buy a gun.

  8. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I like to mix various sodas with my beer. Monster Ultra Zero and lager beer go well together.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Post COD K/D ratio or gtfo

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        I don't play cod. I just like the energy drink because it was a meme here like 6-7 years ago.
        >that first sip of the day

  9. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    My alcoholic move after my fiancée pointed out how many drinks id had on a weeknight was to crack a lacroix and pour some vodka in it.
    This worked until one time she wanted a sip of it.

  10. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    to me alcohol is associated to weekends, so I don't drink on a regular basis, and it is rare to even drink on weekends for me
    to me alcohol is something I take to get drunk, socially, the most I'll do is have a beer or two on the weekend by myself

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      I have been drunk every day for like 10 years but I still managed to go overboard last night and I'm currently dying from a hangover. I'm not working today because of weather even though it's not fricking raining and its not going to but I guess that's okay because I truly feel like shit

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >every day for like 10 years
        anon, you probably already know, but that's not going to end well, it's going to frick up your health big time

        • 2 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          I'm from dirt poor Irish and French immigrant stock everyone in my family lives until 80 years old being a complete piece of shit I just shouldn't have taken 5 shots of vodka and drank 2 monacos in addition to my regular beer regimen. Young people are moronic and think that drinking being unhealthy mean you will die of liver failure at 29 but what it actually means is if you drink a liter of vodka every day you'll die at 55

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            Try taking one of those hangover supplements that contain hidhydromyricitin before going to bed. They work remarkably well.

          • 2 weeks ago
            Anonymous

            idk pham, do you think everyone in your family that got to 80 drank every day the same you do?
            Idk pham, why do it in the first place? It's most fricking unhealthy behavior phisically and spiritually.

            • 2 weeks ago
              Anonymous

              >idk pham, do you think everyone in your family that got to 80 drank every day the same you do?
              Yes and it's not a matter of what I "think"
              >why do it in the first place?
              Physical addiction

              • 2 weeks ago
                Anonymous

                >Physical addiction
                get some self love anon, you'll enjoy buzz after that again, I think it's worth it, you're an alcoholic as frick, by the manual
                c'mon anon, do it for yourself

      • 2 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        >I have to go in at midnight
        Well at least I already want to go to sleep

  11. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    you can add salt to food to enhance the flavor. don’t tell anyone!

  12. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    I refuse to go grocery shopping or cook if the house is messy. I'm perfectly fine just eating McDonald's for lunch break a few days. Wife got a lot better at keeping the house when she found out idgaf and am satisfied with omad. Either she loses weight and gets semi-attractive again or she gets off her ass and does her job. You can't lose.

  13. 2 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Fine wine is cheapest in the ghetto.

    • 2 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      It's dark people so it's probably malt.

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