What was the last dish you fricked up?

Post your cooking frick ups.

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  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    It's been a while, but I made a stir-fry and used like half a cup of fish sauce. Holy shit, that was a salt bomb.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Why in the frick would you use half a cup of fish sauce? I won't use more than a few tablespoons for Thai curry.

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I put too much salt in my ground beef.

  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Sometimes I heat the milk too much and break my roux
    I fricking hate it when I do that why can't I just be patient

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    last month making hummus, used a different brand of tahini because the store didn't have the one I usually use. used the same amount as usual but for some reason the taste was way stronger and it made my hummus super thick and nutty. still ate it but it wasn't very good

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Tahini is just as easy to make as hummus.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        yes I know, the last time I tried though my shitty blender wasn't up to the task. have a better one now so maybe I should give it another go

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    absolutely could not salvage this one.
    >be me, making a cheese sauce for homemade mac n cheese
    >use way too much butter to start the roux
    >add more flour to even it out
    >still not right consistency, keep adding flour
    >when it's not gettting better no matter what, say 'frick it' and add the block of cheese to melt in
    >get it all melty and smooth, albeit thick-looking sauce
    >taste for seasoning
    >Sweet.jpg
    >not just sweet, suspiciously sweet
    >find out it was powdered sugar, not flour, and that the flour is kept somewhere else in the kitchen
    >keep the abomination for a week to try and figure out if I can redeem it
    >maybe a cheesecake?.mp4
    >find out you can balance sugar out with salt
    >try it
    >it still tastes like it belongs on top of a cake
    >throw the whole thing out, counting it as a learned lesson

    and that's how I inadvertently taught myself how to make icing

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      i messed up a roux for a cheese sauce the other day, instead of a white roux i turned it into a dark/brown roux by over cooking the frick out of it and my cheese sauce nutty flavored

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        This is a happy accident not a mistake

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          it was good but not exactly right for cheese nachos, though if i make something like au gratin potatoes i will try this

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            You use a sauce for cheese nachos? I shred cheese overtop them on a sheet pan and broil them. You know they're getting good when even the chips brown just a little.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              i use sharp cheddar which has a tendency to split so a roux/bechmel sauce helps keep it together

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Use a little sodium citrate to keep a cheese sauce from breaking.

                Captcha: TRYY

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                Or a slice of two of American cheese. Same thing

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                yeah people shit on american cheese for being "plastic" but its such a good ingredient i keep some in the house always. Also i don't give a shit its great on burgers with a slice of cheddar too.

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                American cheese isn't even plastic, that's people conflating american cheese and Kraft Singles cheese adjacent substance or velveeda.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      whose kitchen were you in

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    fish curry with frozen fish.
    Frick it tasted bad.
    Also kentucky butter cake. Idk why it kept coming out feeling doughy/ too dense.

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I burned my hamburgerv today cause I was playing GTA

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    it wasn't really a mistake, I just realized I was running out of time when I was making some bolognese. I didn't have enough time to simmer it for awhile so I turned up the heat a bit to reduce it faster because I had to leave. The finished product turned out well but there was a bit burnt to the bottom of the pan when I took it out of the pot.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >it wasn't really a mistake
      burning the sauce is what you were going for then?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I purposely put it on the incorrect heat.
        Also the sauce ended up fine, the only burnt part stayed at the bottom of the pot and didn't really affect the taste of the sauce.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          now that I think about it. I burned my sauce a few days ago too
          and it also was fine without stirring it up and leaving it in the pot
          my sauce/gravy was creamed eggs with sausage

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      so it didn't taste burnt even though you burnt it?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        thats right
        if you don't agitate the burned bits, they don't taint the dish
        and when you pour the stuff out of the pot, let the burned stuff stick to the pot. spoon it out if it gets in when you pour it off

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          I've tried it a couple of times but it always tastes a bit burnt
          kind of works with chili
          doesn't work with anything else

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            you obviously failed
            my creamed eggs taste fine. so much so that I forgot that I did the same thing I was busting on

            it wasn't really a mistake, I just realized I was running out of time when I was making some bolognese. I didn't have enough time to simmer it for awhile so I turned up the heat a bit to reduce it faster because I had to leave. The finished product turned out well but there was a bit burnt to the bottom of the pan when I took it out of the pot.

            4 days ago
            you must have not realized it burned and stirred some up. it happens

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    recent ones
    >too much water in green thai curry, and used fresh firm tofu, tofu tasted bland
    >roasted chicken probably pulled out too early, clear juice but too much juice scared family members so they wanted it back into the oven longer, absolutely dry
    >drunk cooking steak, pull too early, delicious but rarer than usual

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Happened about a month ago, I was making some chili while talking on the phone and ended up charring the bottom of the pot. It was still edible but the burnt taste was disheartening

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >once I got too drunk before cooking and my steak came out medium-rare instead of rare

    this is what you guys sound like.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >why are people on a cooking board sticklers for cooking
      This is what you sound like.

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I literally can not remember the last time I fricked up.

  13. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Twice now I've gotten so drunk I passed out while apparently cooking (I literally don't remember the evenings prior). Both times I've woken up to black-charred carbon in a fry pan still cooking and a houseful of smoke.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      we covered this one already:

      >once I got too drunk before cooking and my steak came out medium-rare instead of rare

      this is what you guys sound like.

  14. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Woke up at 5am last week and wanted some grits with breakfast. Never make them usually so went by the recipe off the box. Was still half asleep and misread “2 tsp salt” as “2 tbsp salt”

    Needless to say I didn’t get to enjoy my grits that morning

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      every time i try to make grits no matter how small of a amount i use i wind up with enough grits to feed a small army

  15. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    My last rice pudding was undercooked and too sticky/clumpy when cold. I'm going to extend the cook time to fix the first problem and add more milk before I cool it to try getting a looser texture. Maybe I should rinse the rice beforehand, too.

  16. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Was making some carrots Vichy to go with sirloin and chips. Everything was coming together. Tried a dash of honey on the carrots, then got distracted. Honey caramelised and burned, spoiling most of the carrots and ruining the aroma. Pissed.

  17. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    OP here, I fricked up a meatloaf revently by leaving it too long in the oven. It didn't want to cook from the inside, so I left it longer. Dry as frick.
    >inb4 OP is moronic
    Yes, I was moronic. Kek

  18. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Years ago, I decided to cook a meal for my family during summer vacation. I made cottage pie, steaks, a veggie casserole, and a basic salad.
    I don't know where I fricked up. But I ended up twenty some people food poisoning, and we were all fricked up for a few days.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >But I ended up twenty some people
      *ended up giving

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >I ended up giving twenty some people food poisoning
      Probably the biggest frick up on this thread holy shit

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Yeah, it was not good. Haven't given people food poisoning since, so... progress?

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >so... progress?
          no, anon, I'm afraid not. Next time shoot for 30 people.
          The only way is forward.

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Well, I have a family gathering in two months. Time to see if the old fricks can handle it. I might have funerals to go to later this year.

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              What's the poison you are cooking this time?

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                I'm going to cook using my unwashed Indian street food hands.

  19. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Made some rolls with baking soda instead of powder. End result just didn't taste good so I made croutons with it instead.

  20. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    i tried to make a pan seared butterflied chicken breast with a garlic beurre monte sauce but somehow i wound upwith shallow fried chicken strips and caramelized garlic in browned butter.
    It was good but not the creamy bright garlic sauce i was going for

  21. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Meatloaf last week. Overcooked it
    Missus won't eat it and my kid doesn't like the mushrooms gravy so I'm stuck eating it for lunch then last several days. Today is the last one.

  22. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I let a pizza for over 15 hours in the oven last weekend

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Was it good?

  23. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    My friend gave me a recipe for fettucine alfredo with bacon that's super vague, so I tried it and it ended up as a thick ball of broken noodles dotted with cheese clumps and mushy bacon. Was pretty bad but I still ate it.

  24. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Last night I hopped in the shower while I was browning onions for French onion soup. The fond got too burned and when I deglazed it, the resulting soup had a burnt taste to ot.

  25. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I can't for the life of me make a pasta that doesn't end up a complete disaster and I'm not sure why. I'm Italian, I make a hell of a sauce, can't make a pasta to save my life.

    Last time I ended up with inedibly dense/chewy ravioli. Had to just cut them in half and eat the filling to not be too wasteful.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Box pasta or making pasta from scratch? If scratch, what is your dough recipe?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I put box pasta in a blender then rehydrate the pastadough overnight then just knead roll and cut.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          I'm sorry anon. It seems that your cooking issues come from your more general problem of profound mental moronation.

  26. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I made a dutch baby but instead of scooping the flour out like I normally do, for some reason I decided to pour it out into the measuring cup. This ended up leaving me with less flour than normal and it turned out more custardy than I wanted in the center.

  27. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Tried to make fricassee but it didnt taste good so I just made a curry from it, tasted way better. Just some spices and tomatoes in there and youre good to go

  28. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I over salted my pizza dough because I mistook the garlic salt container for garlic powder.

  29. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I made apple pie and made two mistakes. One, I forgot to add fricking salt before filling and crimping it. Two, the filling was too liquidy so the bottom crust was soggy. Ended up draining the liquid out, sprinkling salt on top, and re-baking until the bottom was firmer. Turned out okay in the end.

  30. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    for me, frick up is a scale with no real defined point. I don't remember the last time I threw something out.

  31. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Smoked a turkey over the weekend and I stuffed it.
    It was really cold outside and I didn't adjust it properly. Cooked for about 8 hours total.

    The turkey came out great but the stuffing was borderline inedible. Way too much smoke absorbed. Which is really depressing because it's going to be a little while before I can try again. At least I'll be cooking a goose next week that I can stuff.

  32. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I tried making a pizza with softer than usual dough, but the real shitty part is that i assembled it on a cutting board before transferring it to my skillet like a moron. I tried sliding it off but it stretched and folded over on itself. I tried to salvage it by shaping it into a calzone but it was pretty awful overall. Sorry I don't have any pics

  33. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >oven roasting chicken thighs on a glass tray
    >notice the skin top is browning while the bottom is still white
    >flip them
    >when flipping again the skins get completely stuck to the glass, ruining my otherwise perfect chicken
    grim

  34. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Overproofed my pizza dough twice yesterday and both times it refused to stretch without tearing. The first one is in the trash and the second got turned into a calzone. Was dense because I ended up overworking the dough to try and fix the constant tearing. How is it that elemtary school dropouts can make pizzas, but I struggle to stretch and shape it properly?

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      i over proof my dough intentionally to the point it starts fermenting and it comes out fine

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Good to know. It's probably a procedural issue leading to the tearing then.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Isn't fermentation the goal with dough? Proofing is just letting it sit long enough for the yeast culture to activate

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          fermenting is when the yeast actually start converting the sugars into alcohol, it adds a beer'ish/sour dough flavor but the dough becoms hard to work with because the gluten starts breaking down and starts turning into soup

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            Your pic describes proofing as fermentation, but your post describes fermentation as an undesired outcome

  35. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Fried onigiri. It fell apart. 🙁

  36. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I opened my crushed pepper wrong. should of flipped up the top instead of unscrewing it.
    Shook off my slice and ate it anyway. Pretty spicy.

  37. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    I made a bacon wrapped chicken cheese thingy in the toaster oven with it wrapped in aluminum foil because I thought it would keep the cheese from leaking out like last time. Cooked it fully and the bacon and chicken came out soggy. Bit into it and there was barely any cheese in the first place. Never buying that thing again.

  38. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    We just moved into a new place and one of the first things I made was some pan-cooked pork chops. The only pan we had while waiting for the movers was a non-stick pan my gf bought (it was one of those Blue Diamond ones you see in the TV commercials). That thing got so hot so fast and I wasn't expecting it. I walked into the other room for maybe 30 seconds while the chops were on medium heat and the next thing I know the smoke alarm is going off and the bottoms were burned. After wiping out the pan, I tried to make a pan sauce but despite having it on low heat to simmer, I couldn't get it to stop being at a rolling boil because the pan retained heat so much. I hate that fricking pan and haven't used it since.

  39. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    My first time cooking Japanese was pretty mediocre but I can't recall the last time I made something not edible

  40. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Gyoza, wanted to half panfry them half steam them but the homemade wrappers just slid off.
    Using premade ones helps.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      The only problem I had while making them was my fricking nonstick pan not doing what its name implies it should be able to do

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        I really hope this is bait

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          I swear to god. That pan is cursed. Overheats in the centre, barely heats on the outer ring

  41. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    damn she was cute. what happened bros

  42. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    i wildly fricked up cornish pasties and i'm still not sure how. they looked great but tasted like absolute shit-- mostly in the dough i think. this was a while ago, i want to give them another shot but they're kind of a pain in the ass to make

  43. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    i've never fricked up a dish in my life (i've only coocked scrambled eggs three times)

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