who the FRICK is the target audience for this?

who the FRICK is the target audience for this?

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  1. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    ME!! IT'S ALL FOR ME!! THESE COMPANIES ARE DOING EVERYTHING FOR ME!!!!!!

  2. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Same market as those who drink regular claws -- dumbfricks and douchebags.

  3. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Illinois (pronounced ill•in•noise)

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      It's actually pronounced ee-yin-nwah

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >ee-yin-nwah
        there's no e in n'wah...

  4. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    This seems like a joke, but White Claw is so popular with a particular not-too-bright demographic they probably figured they'd roll the dice and see what kind of brand loyalty they really have.

  5. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    After a certain point, you might as well just drink caffeine-free Pepsi or Coke.
    Alcohol might be empty calories, but 0% booze might as well be carbonated water.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >but 0% booze might as well be carbonated water
      It literally is carbonated water you fricking moron. That's the joke.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Damn blud is hella pressed over it, must be from reddit

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >gets called out for being a moron
          >calls them reddit
          Many such cases.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            I was actually defending my bro over there. You're steppin on the wrong porkchop, sister.

  6. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >who the FRICK is the target audience for this?
    I think there must be some portion of the world drinking NAs for inclusion in the fun, the same people who might order a virgin frozen margarita or pina colada. It's for food pairing. I also know that some people who cut back on their alcohol intake mix their beer half and half with NAs.

    Years ago, I had such a weird craving for beer whenever someone ordered chicken wings for the table. I was on a medication that I couldn't mix with alcohol and just being forbidden drove the cravings up. Being the designated driver can do the same thing to a person. Maybe those guys are ordering NAs. There used to be a trick to look like you were drinking and avoid peer pressue by having a Coke or tonic water with the lime wedge. It just looks like a wienertail in your hand, so you don't have to discuss it.

  7. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    People are paying $20 for 12 cans of flavored sparkling water? Wtf is wrong with Americans?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Americans got tricked into paying for water like the dumbasses they are, despite having that shit on literal tap. It's the only way we can sap the richgays of their money and get morons who pretend to be richgays in the process.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Water from the tap isn't actually free and if you were older than 18 you would know that from the water bill you have to pay.

  8. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    But people tell me they drink beer because they like the flavor?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      This is dumbest meme. Beer tastes good.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        So what's the problem with the OP pic?

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          OP isn't beer. White Claw is soda with vodka added. De-alcoholised vodka is water.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Normal White Claw is malt beverage, not vodka and soda. They have recently produced a vodka and soda, but that's not what most people think of when they think of white claw.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          I realize this is a matter of opinion but seltzer tastes like shit regardless of whether it has alcohol in it

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        I can't tell you how many times I've seen people try to claim that the comic isn't taking a side and is just meant to generate discussion. Picky eaters are fricking delusional and ALWAYS use the "everyone else is just pretending to like it" line because they can't accept that there's something inherently wrong with them.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          I just eat what I like to eat. I'm an adult. Why would any adult that is spending their own money on food, in their right mind, eat something that they find distasteful?

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >picky eater trying to rationalize their baby palate by saying they're the adult
            And this is the other line picky eaters always use (it's not like they have many options, lol). It's either, "everyone else is just pretending to like it" or they conflate having preferences with picky eating, when in reality they're polar opposites.

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              >And this is the other line picky eaters always use (it's not like they have many options, lol). It's either, "everyone else is just pretending to like it" or they conflate having preferences with picky eating, when in reality they're polar opposites.
              Are you moronic?
              What is your rationale for eating food you don't like?
              Did mommy and daddy beat you too many times when you were a kid, and now you lack the cognitive abilities to think for yourself?

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                Only morons quote an entire post. There's no point to doing that, because you're not singling out anything in particular to respond to. Maybe you should try again, and this time show me where I claimed people should eat food they don't like.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                >Only morons quote an entire post. There's no point to doing that, because you're not singling out anything in particular to respond to. Maybe you should try again, and this time show me where I claimed people should eat food they don't like.
                Look, Bro, I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings and made you cry like a little girl. Here, have a box of Kleenex so you can blow your nose and wipe away the tears. We don't need to insult each other. We can deal with our problems in a respectful manner, like grownups.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                >they conflate having preferences with picky eating, when in reality they're polar opposites
                nta but what’s your distinction between picky eaters and people with preferences! Based on how I’ve seen the word used a picky eater is just someone with strong, narrow preferences

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                Having preferences is normal, healthy behavior (I forgot to mention the other line picky eaters use, which is "what, so you just blindly eat anything and everything? Like a pig?!"). Having preferences means you have a positive relationship towards food, and get more excited about certain things than others. Being a picky eater is a purely negative relationship, where you completely avoid entire categories of food, and have such a strong mental hang-up about them that you'll work yourself up into being ready to vomit before the food ever touches your lips (that's obviously a bit hyperbolic, but not exactly unheard of; you've probably met someone like that). You can't really have preferences if you're a picky eater (unless we're talking about chicken nuggets from different fast food places) because a picky eater doesn't allow themself to really try enough things to have any real experience. Of course taste is subjective, but you can't have taste if you don't have a developed palate. You have no character; you're an npc. This close-mindedness and lack of empathy and imagination tends to affect most aspects of the picky eater's personality, which is why picky eaters are objectively Bad people and it's okay to bully them.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                pref·er·ence
                /ˈpref(ə)rəns/
                noun
                plural noun: preferences

                1.
                a greater liking for one alternative over another or others.
                "he chose a clock in preference to a watch"

                Picky eating (also known as fussy, faddy or choosy eating) is usually classified as part of a spectrum of feeding difficulties. It is characterised by an unwillingness to eat familiar foods or to try new foods, as well as strong food preferences.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                If your preferences are based on avoiding other food then it isn't a preference, it is an inevitability. There is no choice involved, NTA.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                >a greater liking for one alternative over another or others
                >get more excited about certain things than others
                Okay...
                >characterised by an unwillingness to eat familiar foods or to try new foods
                >a purely negative relationship, where you completely avoid entire categories of food
                It seems like we're in agreement over the difference, and my characterization of it as distinction between having a positive and negative relationship towards food seems to line up with the definitions you provided. It just seems like you're hung up on the word "preference", but I don't see how that's useful. Going back to the chicken nugget example, I would say that many picky eaters do also have strong preferences; I mean, if you're eating tendies and nuggies for every other meal you're probably going to have some pretty strong, almost autistic opinions on which ones are better. But that says nothing about the bigger issue, which is why you're eating chicken nuggets for every other meal in the first place. If you try to tell me it's just because you really, really like chicken nuggets I wont believe you.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >if you don't like carbonated stagnant water containing a little bit of ethanol shat out by bacteria, you're a picky eater
          touched a nerve I see...

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >I need to make up narratives to win arguments
            Not that anon, by the way.

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              >seething
              shouldn't you be drinking your brown burple juice, anon? it's supposed to mellow you out.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >if you don't like carbonated stagnant water containing a little bit of ethanol shat out by bacteria, you're a picky eater
            I literally never said that, but god damn you people are sensitive (the biggest snowflakes are always the ones to accuse the other party of being a snowflake, just like closeted homosexuals are the ones who never shut up about trannies ruining western civilization).

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              >just like closeted homosexuals are the ones who never shut up about trannies ruining western civilization).
              funny how it always used to be closeted homos hating on homos, but now homos are mostly accepted and trannies are the new boogeyman, the goalposts shift. the people that hated gays and now trannies are not closeted. it was a moronic argument then, and it is now, as are you

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                But there absolutely was (and is) a long history of some of the most anti-gay activists turning out to be gay. It's their own inner struggle to suppress their gay urges projected outward that makes them so vehement. Obviously that's not everybody; some people just find the idea icky. With trannies it's a little different, because you don't have to be gay if someone looks like a girl, so the issue is they get confused and it makes them question their own sexuality. I don't actually think most of them are gay either (being attracted to a woman isn't gay), but I do like to call them gay because that's the very thing they're most afraid of. In any case, it's undeniable that nobody spends more time thinking about feminine penis than someone like Matt Walsh or /misc/tards in general.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                >you don't have to be gay if someone looks like a girl
                Trannies don't look like girls.
                >being attracted to a woman isn't gay
                Trannies aren't women.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >not drinking a certain kind of alcohol makes you a picky eater
          Alcoholic copes get more creative every day

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Stouts and porters are delicious, it's like malty liquid dark chocolate with a smooth after taste. Sometimes I'll buy non-alcoholic Guinness just for the flavor (but don't want any alcohol for the day). You're just a tastelet.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Sadly unpopular and more costly to produce. A tear rolls down my cheek every time I look for some stout and all I find is Guinness.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          I like Guinness, but I get it, it gets boring drinking the same thing. Maybe you find a Murphy's occasionally if you're lucky. It's almost always craft beer if you want something else.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            I'm fine with paying craft beer prices for stout. I never even see Murphy's where I am. Only guinness. There were some craft stouts about 4 yeara ago but they all disappeared.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          If you're only able to find a Guinness when looking for a stout or porter, you're in the wrong store. Restaurants serve Guinness because normie npcs will drink that 4.5% watered down brown. They'll shit themselves at a 7.5% actual porter or stout. Why do you think crap like michelobe, bud, miller, corona, and other light no-flavor beers are so popular?

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            I had a black IPA this summer, they will make stout IPA before they make stout around here. I live in a stout desert.
            But it is good to hear this isn't the case everywhere like I assumed.

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              stout IPA isn't a real thing. They just made a dark IPA. My grocery store has a few stouts and porters. if you have a local liquor store, chat up the pajeet running the place and find out who their distributor is. They cannot legally get beer from anyone but the 1 distributor they have nearby. Ask to see if they can order some different shit for you. They may ask you to order a full case, they may be open to ordering a case in the hopes something will sell.

              >distributors
              Its a legalized monopoly as to what stores can get what inventory. Its why you'll notice there probably isn't a nearby store with notably different beer and liquor for sale. They're all buying from 1 distributor.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      If your beer doesnt taste good your drinking the wrong beer. I used to dislike beer until I got exposed to more than the big lable American garbage.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        his drinking the wrong beer?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      I always thought xkcd was a homosexual pseud and this confirmed it.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      So he doesn't like beer and just forces himself to drink it because he doesn't have the balls to say he doesn't want to?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Beer tastes like rotten bread and ass but for social reasons you have to play along with this mass delusion that it's wow so tasty or else you're an autistic freakazoid

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      I'm 41 and tried many different beers. Don't like them. Never did, never will. I do like hard liquor from the first time I tried it. Just accept that people have different tastes. Your expensive craft beer still tastes bad to me.

  9. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    oi, you got a license to buy that sparkling water?

  10. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Me senpai

  11. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Recovering alcoholic women

  12. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Normies, pseuds and lesbians

  13. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    A lot of younger people in their early 20s simply do not like drinking alcohol both for flavor, loss of inhibition, and general cost. I only recently read about this with the introduction of "Mocktails" which by design are supposed to look like a wienertail while you're with your friends who do drink helping you fit in. A mocktail is essentially a $12 glass of juice. I even ask what the frick the bar tender was making without any alcohol for a woman that looked like she was in her 40s (she was in her early 30s) and said several times an hour she has to make a mocktail (at a bar) for people who don't drink but are there with friends.

    The number of times I've seen those Heineken 0 bottles at a bar is astounding. Its Heineken beer (yuck) with 0% alcohol. Whats the fricking point? I had someone tell me they really enjoy the flavor but don't want to get drunk or risk an OWI/DWI. I get wanting to avoid a $10,000 fine for enjoying a drink on the weekend, but why would you pay $8 for a shitty alcohol free beer at a bar?

    It used to be "club soda with lime" for the sober person. Now theres all kinds of dumb shit places are willing to sell socially awkward morons.

    tl;dr young people wanting to fit in at the bar, but don't like drinking is why these alcohol free beverages exist.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Virgin wienertails are not some new thing. When I was in elementary school (early 90's) I always used to order a virgin pina colada with a strawberry swirl (forget the actual name of the wienertail; something about volcanos I think) at a particular restaurant my family used to go to.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        >Virgin wienertails are not some new thing.
        Right, and they were generally reserved for children and women who know they become 100% moronic when drinking. Now its socially acceptable to be a man in his 30s and order a mocktail, but wouldn't if they had to call it a virgin old fashioned or something gay.

        Why not just get a glass of water and tell people it is vodka?
        It's not like a bunch of drunks will be able to tell the difference by smell or sight alone.

        Dude I don't fricking know. mocktails aren't for me because again its a $10+ glass of juice at a bar. if I couldn't drink or just didn't want to but still wanted a refreshment, I'd order a soda and the people I was with might get an explanation but I have the self confidence not to care if people think its odd I'm not drinking in a group.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          I'm deeply confused as to what your point is. Are you saying that I HAVE to become inebriated, for some reason?

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            Yes, you're either sober or frickin plastered after a couple drinks.

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          I feel like you're being purposely obtuse here. It's fun to have a special drink. It's fun to be included in having something tasty and different to sip on while you're out with your friends even if you're not getting drunk. I'm not a teetotaler but I am a hobbyist drink maker and whenever I'm having a party and I know one or some of my guests doesn't drink I try to have a fun mocktail to make them so they can still be included. My wife would order mocktails all the time when we were out to dinner while she was pregnant and I was having a drink. It made her feel like she was having more of a night. When I'm having a larger party I usually do 2 different self serve drinks in dispensers, one wienertail and one mocktail for the same reason.
          No one is saying paying 12 bucks for a glass of juice is economical, but it's fun to be included.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        A "Miami Vice" is a pina coloda and strawberry daiquiri mixed together

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Why not just get a glass of water and tell people it is vodka?
      It's not like a bunch of drunks will be able to tell the difference by smell or sight alone.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >but why would you pay $8 for a shitty alcohol free beer at a bar
      I know I can barely stand paying $10+ for a tiny ass shot from a $15 bottle of alcohol at a bar, paying that for fake piss water is way too damn far for me. But I also don't ever remember ANYONE getting judgemental at what I drank growing up, in college, or later, with regards to alcohol. Only shit I ever caught was for liking a brand of soda from family, and you don't get to pick family. I think this shit stems from the newest generation having massive anxiety and shit over imagined things, and the market just shifted to cater to it.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Oh yeah for sure, remember how O'douls famously came out in the last decade.

  14. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    This has to be targeted to kids.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      This.

      I loved drinking sparkling grape juice and pretending it was wine when I was a kid.

  15. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >$20 for a 12 pack of seltzer waters
    So they took out the expensive ingredient (alcohol) and didn't even change the price. Very nice, people will still buy it.

  16. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    I.. I like White Claw.. but I would never buy a non-alcoholic variety. What's the point?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Some people can't afford it so it's a status thing? and your life whether you admit it or not is controlled by brands. Probably from social media peer pressure

  17. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Its got electrolytes!

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      You talk like a gay and your shit’s all moronic.

  18. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    i randomly picked these up (while also getting actual liquor) and they were pretty good. was basically hops-flavored seltzer. it's now my favorite seltzer flavor and i get it all the time. don't know why the bigger makers of this try out a hops flavor. probably because they're expensive and lagunita's has them available already

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >who the FRICK is the target audience for this?

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      >hops flavor
      So it tastes like wet grass and dumpster juice?

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Why the HELL would you know what dumpster juice (?) tastes like ?
        everyone knows what wet grass tastes like tho

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          Same way everyone knows what wet grass tastes like? You don't actually have to have it in your mouth to have a good idea what it tastes like.

      • 2 months ago
        Anonymous

        Hops has actually been used to flavor things for centuries, I bet that drink is quite good.
        I just recently have gotten into this mead that's flavored with hops and it's the absolute breasts

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          I’ve seen people on Culinaly bring up the fricking German purity law as an argument against IPAs, not knowing that hops are literally one of the 3 or 4 ingredients allowed under it. 99.9999% of every beer being sold today is flavored with hops - even their precious Bud Light. This board has become so moronic over the past ~5 years I have no idea why I even still come here (probably because I’m also a moron).

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            we're morons because we drink beer

        • 2 months ago
          Anonymous

          >Hops has actually been used to flavor things for centuries
          Hops primary use was to preserve water. Drinking a mug of water could make you actually sick in ye olden days so in order to avoid dying from chronic diarrhea they added hops, they often fermented shit into alcoholic beverages again, to avoid bad shit in water. Hundreds or thousands of years ago people weren't drinking beer for breakfast and wine regularly because alcoholism was fashionable, it was because clean water wasn't really a thing.

          Hops grew easily, it could be used to preserve water, and keep people alive. IPA's, Indian Pale Ales are extra hoppy because they had to add extra hops to the beer barrel so the crew on a ship had drinkable water on long journeys. Today hipsters think its fun to make shit as bitter, grassy, and disgusting as possible. Now you're trying to tell me hops flavored alcohol free water is because people simply enjoy the flavor? You've lost the plot.

          • 2 months ago
            Anonymous

            >could make you actually sick in ye olden days
            tired of seeing this factoid posted everywhere
            https://leslefts.blogspot.com/2013/11/the-great-medieval-water-myth.html

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              >I hate facts
              okay, but that still doesn't change that water from a stream, water from a well, and water stored in barrels was likely to harbor shit to make you ill.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                I thought you were moronic with your first post about how hops were only ever used as a means of fermentation and implying that no one, across all that time, ever generally liked the taste and thus would use them for flavoring, but now I know you're moronic.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                >implying that no one, across all that time, ever generally liked the taste and thus would use them for flavoring,
                oh that explains why hops aren't in anything other than beer and malt liquor huh.

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                Well considering the whole thing we're arguing about is something that's not either of those things being flavored with them you look pretty moronic huh?

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                You mean the Lagunitas hoppy flavored water that several posts were talking about being incredibly stupid because water and hops isn't a good flavor? Did you lose track of the conversation?

              • 2 months ago
                Anonymous

                >Several posts
                >One dumbass being a dumbass

            • 2 months ago
              Anonymous

              >I hate facts
              okay, but that still doesn't change that water from a stream, water from a well, and water stored in barrels was likely to harbor shit to make you ill.

              I think this myth is spread to make people feel like they need to rely on modern water treatment to live because water is just SOOOOOOO dangerous without treatment. I've been on hikes where I'll refill my water bottle from a clear running stream and people will lose their minds over it, but it's the cleanest and best-tasting water you can get and it's never made me sick a single time.

  19. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Whether you're a chick or a dude, you're always 4 Claws away from a dick in your mouth.

  20. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Whiteclaws taste better than regular seltzers, but $20 for a 12 pack is moronic expensive

  21. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    The same type that drinks o'dools but for a younger market. Isn't that obvious?

  22. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    All I know about this thing is that mikeburnfire's friend Zach is oddly fanboyish about it. It's like he's begging for sponsorship.

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Don't talk about literal whos here zoomie

  23. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    Me. I love ale, but the shitty macrobrew lagers you get in England make me feel sick, while non-alcoholic beer I think is actually nice and sort of reminds me of the Krautish Koelsch, which I also really liked.

  24. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    support your local, illinoisbros

  25. 2 months ago
    Anonymous

    >non-alcoholic
    If i want to drink nonalcolol beer i'll just have a sangria
    And then shoot myself to get the shitty taste out of my mouth

    • 2 months ago
      Anonymous

      Sangria has alcohol in it, though.

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