>you will never taste of the boiled succulent flesh of an artic seal pup

>you will never taste of the boiled succulent flesh of an artic seal pup
Why even live?

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  1. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Oh well. At least I can eat McChickens

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      We call 'em junior chickens up here, bud.

  2. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    True story: There once was a species of giant island tortoise that English sailors encountered during their explorations back in the 18th century or whatever. In their journals and stuff these sailors described the meat of the tortoise as being the most delicious food they'd ever tried. They used to catch these tortoises and stack them in the holds of their ships to keep them fresh for long sea voyages. I say there "once was" this species of tortoise because they're extinct now. They're the only known species that was eaten into extinction by people.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      That species name?
      The Dodo.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        dodos were primarily wiped out by the animals people brought to the island which killed them and ate their eggs. dodo meat supposedly tasted pretty bad

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      There was a story (maybe Arthur Gordon Pym by Poe) that mentioned this. Yes, it was Pym:

      “In a subsequent portion of this narrative I shall have frequent occasion to mention this species of tortoise. It is found principally, as most of my readers may know, in the group of islands called the Gallipagos, which, indeed, derive their name from the animal—the Spanish word Gallipago meaning a fresh-water terrapin. From the peculiarity of their shape and action they have been sometimes called the elephant tortoise. They are frequently found of an enormous size. I have myself seen several which would weigh from twelve to fifteen hundred pounds, although I do not remember that any navigator speaks of having seen them weighing more than eight hundred. Their appearance is singular, and even disgusting. Their steps are very slow, measured, and heavy, their bodies being carried about a foot from the ground. Their neck is long, and exceedingly slender; from eighteen inches to two feet is a very common length, and I killed one, where the distance from the shoulder to the extremity of the head was no less than three feet ten inches. The head has a striking resemblance to that of a serpent. They can exist without food for an almost incredible length of time, instances having been known where they have been thrown into the hold of a vessel and lain two years without nourishment of any kind—being as fat, and, in every respect, in as good order at the expiration of the time as when they were first put in. In one particular these extraordinary animals bear a resemblance to the dromedary, or camel of the desert. In a bag at the root of the neck they carry with them a constant supply of water. In some instances, upon killing them after a full year’s deprivation of all nourishment, as much as three gallons of perfectly sweet and fresh water have been found in their bags.”

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      QI said that this is why they didn't receive a scientific name for so long. On every expedition meant to bring them back to the royal society, the ended up being eaten because they were just too good.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      i hate england so much

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Eternal Anglo strikes again.

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      those were Galapagos tortoises which do still exist.

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        isn't their only remaining member a 200 year old virgin?

        • 3 weeks ago
          Anonymous

          no that was a pinta island tortoise
          https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lonesome_George

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      Steller's sea cow was eaten to extinction too

      • 3 weeks ago
        Anonymous

        Passenger pigeon as well.

  3. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Seal meat makes your fingers go numb.

  4. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    You're a b***h ass Black person OP. Even fricking eskimos, snowBlack folk stuck in the stone age, can hunt a full grown seal or whale and you, with all your modern "conveniences", stick to the weakest, slowest, baby animals like a pussy.
    Go to the jungle and hunt an adult tiger, you fricking coward.

  5. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    >boiled
    Frick off bong.

  6. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    Bro just like go to the arctic and kill one yourself
    What else are you doing with your time?

    • 3 weeks ago
      Anonymous

      go to your local zoo

  7. 3 weeks ago
    Anonymous

    That's not even a seal it's a sea lion lmao

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