Your family recipes. Hand them over.

Your family recipes. Hand them over.

  1. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Mix a pound of butter, sugar and flour together then add generous helpings of shredded extra old cheddar, black pepper, rosemary, and a dollop of reduced Maple syrup, and a dash of ground chipotle pepper. Put in glass baking pan, use fork to make a grid of pin pricks, cook for 45 minutes at 325 starting from a cold oven. Add additional shredded cheddar on top and broil for one minute.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      3 beers before driving to whataburger

      Doth ShitmerryKKKant's rILLLY???

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >a dollop of reduced Maple syrup
      please use proper fucking measurements when posting recope you goddamn leaf, idk what a "dollop" is to you personally

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        It's to taste, use however much you want

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >put in 12 fl oz of maple syrup
          >no way of knowing if it's enough, too little, too much etc until after it's done
          >it tastes like shit
          yeah that's really helpful

          • 1 month ago
            Anonymous

            >he doesn't have the Maple syrup sixth sense

            • 1 month ago
              Anonymous

              yeah because i'm from the greatest country on earth not the gayest, just become the 51st state already we all know you're gonna do it sooner or later

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                >he's this fucking mad he doesn't have the Maple syrup sixth sense
                stay jelly

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                if i was canadian i think i would just straight up renounce my citizenship and live on a boat in international waters

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                If you were Canadian you'd be able to gage how much Maple syrup to use and wouldn't be so bitter

              • 1 month ago
                Anonymous

                maybe but i woulfn't ever have time tp cook because i would be too busy sucking trudeau's cock and paying muh reperations to the french or whatever

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >pound of butter, sugar and flour together then add generous helpings of shredded extra old cheddar,
      a pound of butter?
      a pound of sugar ??
      a pound of flour???
      cheddar fucking cheese!?!?!?
      what the fuck is this monstrosity

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        You've never heard of a pound cake before you fucking cooklet? Go back to Culinaly you retarded tourist

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >cheddar pound cake

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        >cook starting in a cold oven
        It's a shortbread anon.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          >sweet cheddar
          idk anon

  2. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    3 beers before driving to whataburger

  3. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    googled recipes; poorly made

  4. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    boil peeled potatoes , endive and onions together(NO SALT, INSTANT STROKE/HEART ATTACK) for 45 minutes, anentire show of Dr. Phil or untill you can suck It through a straw, whichever comes first.
    Serve
    Bone apple teeth!

  5. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    My mother was known in all her social circles for these cookies, and after she died I ended up teaching students with an interest in cooking. I was proud to teach it to them, and I'm sure she'd be happy if any of you used it, as well.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >comic sans
      Your mother is a cuck and I’ll fuck your dad in front of her

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Learn to read, she's dead Jim.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          I blame comic sans

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Your mother has no idea how ingredient lists work

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      2 TABLESPOONS OF VANILLA EXTRACT?!!?! ARE YOU FUCKING SURE!!?!?!

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >1 box light brown sugar
      A little much, don't you think?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        That's exactly the brand she used, too.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Thank you for sharing, Anon. What would happen if the Crisco was replaced with more butter?

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        The texture would be a bit different, but it wouldn't ruin them.

        https://i.imgur.com/Zfogwau.jpg

        this is one of those joke recipes.
        >a box of brown sugar?
        >melted butter and crisco

        I'm no baker, but I know different fats give different textures. As for the box of sugar, while it doesn't mention it this is for a large batch. She always had both ovens going when baking these. It was the only time other than holidays that she would use the second oven, really.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      this is one of those joke recipes.
      >a box of brown sugar?
      >melted butter and crisco

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      What are 2 table spoons of a misprint

  6. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    My family secret Hispanice is... love.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      And a whole lot of Crack Cocaine!

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Actually they are Salt, Sugar, Maize Starch, Flavour Enhancer (621), Vegetable Oil, Hispanices, Vegetable Protein Extract (Contains Soy), Acidity Regulator (330), Hydrolysed Vegetable Protein (Contains Soy).

  7. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    People's cherished family recipes are usually something that aunt Bea got off the back of a Campbell's soup can in 1983

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      If that were true then everybody would have the exact same family recipes.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      haha that's my mom's chicken Casserole.

  8. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    2kg beef
    1.5kg onions
    8 garlic cloves
    8 shallots
    2 red sweet peppers
    400g canned diced tomatos
    50g tomato paste
    1 bottle of dry red wine (i use dornfelder)
    2 stock cubes
    heatproof olive oil
    salt, pepper, paprika, caraway

    cut beef into 4cm cubes, season with salt and pepper, oil in high heat cast iron pot, sear the beef from all sides, get the beef out, then put in more oil, diced onions, pepper and garlic, when brown tomato paste, stir for a minute so it doesnt burn, deglaze with wine, tomato cubes into the pot, rest of the wine, stock cube & peeled whole shallots, Hispanices, maybe some water if not everything is covered, then let it simmer for 6+ hours

    serve with spaetzle or german bread dumplings

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Instructions unclear got dick caught in ceiling fan.

  9. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >grandma was a chef and her recipes are only half preserved in writing, only one that has some real insight into them is my mom because she helped her cook a bunch but even so she rarely made the stuff herself and isn't into the kind of food grandma made to begin with
    >dad also knew how to make delicious, if unhealthy, food, his recipes went into the grave with him, tried to coax a few out in his last few years but his brain was too far gone from alcohol and maybe early alzheimer's by that point
    I've got nothing

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Goddamn. I really wanted to hear about pops unhealthy stuff. My grandma can cook up a storm but she only speaks arabic and is like 90 years old. My mom is an okay cook but nothing super special. No super bomb secret recipe.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        Most of his stuff wasn't very complex, varieties of cooked meat plus a side. I think my love for it is more motivated by nostalgia and not being able to capture that exact taste myself. The one recipe that was a bit more complex that I wish I could have gotten from him was his recipe for "svaljki", which is a type of gnocchi (I think). He made them with instant mash, I tried making them myself from what I could remember but I just made an inedible mess.
        Probe your grandma for recipes while you can, help her with cooking, unless she's one of those types that are super hostile towards plebs in the kitchen.

  10. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    biscuits
    100% 275g self rising flour
    62% 170g milk
    22% 60g lard

    ---------------------------
    meatloaf
    1/2 cup bread crumbs
    2/3 cup milk
    1 beaten eggs
    1/3 cup onion grated (not chopped trust me)
    1/2 tsp salt
    1/2 tsp MSG
    1/2 tsp sage
    1/2 tsp pepper
    1 lbs hamburger

    topping
    1/4 cup brown sugar
    1/3 cup ketchup
    1/4 tsp nutmeg
    1 tsp dry mustard

    combine everything but hamburger. mix well.
    add hamburger and mix with hands (or gloved hands) till
    homogenous. shape in to loaf. wrap sides with bacon.

    top with BBQ sauce mixed with 1/2 tsp gorund nutmeg

    bake at 350 degrees until internal temp is 150 degrees freedom.
    --------------------------------
    Banana Bread

    3 Large Bananas the older the better
    3/4 Cup Sugar
    2 Large Eggs
    1/2 Cup Canola or Vegetable oil
    3/4 Cups water
    2 Cups flour
    1/2 teaspoon salt
    1 teaspoon baking soda

    optional but recommended
    1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
    1/2 teaspoon nutmeg
    1/2 teaspoon clove
    1/2 teaspoon ginger

    Preheat oven to 300 degrees.
    Mash Bananas and stir in sugar, eggs, oil, and water.
    In separate bowl combine remaining ingredients and mix well.
    Mix well
    Fill loaf or cupcake pans to 2/3 full.
    Makes 3-4 small loafs or 6-8 large cupcakes.
    Recipe can be Doubled
    Bake until loaves crack, turn light brown and a toothpick stuck in the
    center comes out clean. About 30 to 45 minutes.
    For best result remove from oven let cool 15 minutes then wrap in cling wrap.
    Cool for 1 hour then put in freezer to keep moist.
    -----------------------------

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      Potato Gratin with White Cheddar Cheese
      Ingredients
      1.
      o 2 1/2 cups whipping cream
      o 3/4 cup finely chopped shallots
      o 2 teaspoons chopped fresh rosemary
      o 2 teaspoons salt
      o 3/4 teaspoon ground black pepper
      o 4 pounds russet potatoes, peeled, cut into 1/4-inch-thick rounds
      o 2 cups (packed) grated sharp white cheddar cheese (about 8 ounces)
      Preparation
      1.
      1. Preheat oven to 375°F. Butter 13x9x2-inch glass baking dish. Whisk cream, shallots, rosemary, salt and pepper in medium bowl to blend. Place half of potatoes in prepared baking dish, overlapping slightly. Sprinkle with 3/4 cup cheese. Top with second layer of potatoes. Pour cream mixture over potatoes in dish. Sprinkle with remaining cheese. Cover gratin with foil and bake 1 hour. Uncover and bake until top is golden brown and potatoes are tender, about 45 minutes longer. Let gratin cool 10 minutes before serving.
      -------------------------

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        German Potato Salad
        7 - 9 small or 4-5 large red potatoes (peeled diced in 1/2 in cubes)
        3 hard boiled eggs (halved then sliced)
        1 small sweet onion or half of a large vidalia (sliced 1/4" thick and quartered)
        1/2 pound real smoked bacon (cut in 1 inch length and fried brown)
        1 & 1/2 cups apple cider vinegar
        1/2 cup water
        3 tablespoons sugar
        2 tablespoons flour or wondra
        2 tablespoons bacon fat
        salt and pepper to your taste

        Boil potatoes till they easily split with a fork but are not mushy (6 to 8 minutes).
        while potatoes boil mix vinegar, water, and sugar. for less vinegary potato salad remove 1/2 cup (or more) of vinegar and replace with equal amount of water.
        when potatoes are finished drain them and let sit until most of the steam escapes gently stirring occasionally.
        in sauce pan melt bacon fat, add onions (reserve 1/3 of the onions) and stir about 1 minute.
        add bacon, stir about 1 minute, then add flour or wondra and stir to coat everything evenly. if using flour lower heat and stir for 2 minutes more.
        add vinegar, water, and sugar to sauce pan and stir until mixture thickens in to a gravy. turn off heat.
        in a large bowl add potatoes, eggs, and the mixture from the sauce pan. gently combine and add any salt and pepper to your taste.
        add remaining uncooked onions and gently combine with everything in the bowl.
        let sit 15 minutes and serve warm, or cover, let cool, refrigerate, and serve cold later.

        • 1 month ago
          Anonymous

          chicken pablano soup
          1/4 cup olive oil
          3 large carrots, cut into 1/2-inch dice
          2 large onions, cut into 1/2-inch dice
          5 stalks celery, cut into 1/2-inch pieces
          1/8 cup minced garlic
          2 to 3 small poblano peppers, seeded and cut into 1/2-inch dice
          1 teaspoon salt
          1/2 teaspoon white pepper
          1/4 teaspoon ground cumin, or more to taste
          1/4 teaspoon dried thyme, or more to taste
          1 tablespoon chicken bouillon granules
          3 quarts chicken broth
          1/2 bunch fresh cilantro leaves, minced
          3 cups diced (large pieces) grilled chicken
          1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter
          1 cup all-purpose flour
          1/2 teaspoon hot sauce, or more to taste
          1 cup heavy cream

          Heat the oil in a large stockpot over medium heat. Add the carrots, onions, celery, garlic, poblano peppers, salt, white pepper, cumin, and thyme. Saute for 7 to 8 minutes, or until the vegetables begin to soften. Stir in the chicken bouillon. Add the chicken broth and cilantro, and cook for 10 to 12 minutes, or until the carrots are tender. Stir in the chicken and cook, stirring frequently, until the chowder is thick and the chicken is heated through. Shortly before the chowder is done, melt the butter in a large skillet over medium heat. Add the flour and stir to combine. Cook, stirring frequently, for 3 to 4 minutes to cook the flour. Do not allow the mixture to brown! Ladle 1 cup of the hot liquid from the stockpot into the skillet, whisking constantly.

          When the first cup of liquid is incorporated, add another 2 cups of liquid, 1 at a time. Pour the mixture in the skillet into the stockpot, whisking to blend. Cook, stirring frequently, for 3 to 5 minutes longer, or until the mixture begins to thicken. Remove the pot from the heat. Stir in the hot sauce, then the cream, and serve.

  11. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >yfw you realized your mother was cooking for 30+ years and didnt have a single recipe or even a signature thing she always made

  12. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Don't have any. Never bothered to learn them.

  13. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Don't share this.

    2 globe tomatoes, medium
    8 serrano, 3" top removed
    10 dried chili arbol, 3" seeded
    2 dried chili guajillo, 4" seeded
    2 dried chili pasilla, 5", seeded
    1/2 white onion, medium
    3 cloves garlic
    1/2 tsp whole cumin seed
    1/8 tsp coriander seed
    1 tsp Knorr tomato-chicken bouillon
    1 1/2 tsp course sea salt
    1/4 tsp white sugar
    3 tbsp white vinegar
    3 cups water

    1. Toast the cumin seed and coriander seed until fragrant, ~3 minutes on medium heat
    2. Add water and all other ingredients to a pot and bring to boil
    3. Turn off burner and cover with lid for 30 minutes
    4. Remove solids to bowl to slightly cool, ~10-15 minutes
    5. Blend warm solids until smooth consistency, then remove to bowl
    6. Add 2 to 2.5 cups of cooking liquid back to loosen salsa, or until desired thickness

    Makes ~1 quart of salsa. For best flavor, refrigerate overnight. Heat can be adjusted by adding or removing chili arbol, but will also diminish over time in refrigerator. Use within 5 days.

    • 1 month ago
      Anonymous

      >Toast seeds for 3 minutes on medium.
      I dont think so.

      • 1 month ago
        Anonymous

        You see that "~" in front of the 3? That means "about". You also see where it says "until fragrant"? That means until it's fragrant. Use your fucking head.

  14. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Don't share this one either.

    2 cups all-purpose flour
    2 teaspoons baking powder
    1/2 teaspoon baking soda
    1 teaspoon granulated sugar
    1/2 teaspoon coarse salt
    1/2 teaspoon cayenne pepper
    1/2 teaspoon smoked paprika
    2 teaspoon garlic powder
    2 teaspoon onion powder
    1 tsp dry rosemary
    1 tsp dry thyme
    6 tablespoons frozen unsalted butter, grated
    6 ounces sharp white cheddar, shredded
    1 1/3 cups cold buttermilk, well shaken
    1/4 cup chopped green onion

    Step 1
    Preheat oven to 425 degrees with racks in upper and lower third. Line two baking sheets with parchment.

    Step 2
    In a large bowl, whisk together dry ingredients. Work grated butter into dry mixture until they form small pebbles then stir in cheddar, cold buttermilk and green onion just until dough comes together; do not overwork.

    Step 3
    Using two spoons or an ice cream scooper, drop dough onto prepared baking sheets, spaced 1 inch apart. (alternatively, you can put dallops into cupcake trays for a more uniform look)

    Step 4
    Bake in oven until golden brown, 12-14 minutes

  15. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    No, you can't have them
    Have the original recipe for Denver Chili *smokebomb*

    12-14 roasted hatch chilis (pueblos if you can't find hatch)
    8 ounce pork tenderloin
    1/4c lard
    1 8oz can of no-salt-added tomato sauce
    4c pork broth or water (do no substitute chicken broth just use water)
    1/4c white flour
    1/4c water (separately)
    salt to taste

    Roughly chop 10-12 roasted peppers, reserve 2
    In a cast iron or heavy-bottomed pan, sear the tenderloin on all sides for 2-3 minutes
    Add pork, lard, tomato sauce, pork broth/water into a slow cooker, cook on low for 8 hours
    After 8 hours, remove pork and let it rest on a cutting board
    In a small bowl, whisk together the flour and wanter until smooth
    Pour it in the slow cooker
    Blend the sauce with an immersion blender or in a stand blender in batches until smooth
    Shred the tenderloin and return it to the slow cooker
    Roughly chop the remaining 2 peppers and add them to the slow cooker with the sauce
    Replace the lid and let it cook for 30-45 minutes or until thickened

  16. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    >Your family recipes. Hand them over.
    well we don't really have any.

    my grandmother on my fathers side never cooked for us. she was really nice and gave us all sorts of treats.

    my grandmother on my mothers side made food that tasted ok, to good but it was best to eat in a dark room. she'd throw together random stuff like:
    leftover shredded chicken (every little bit of the chicken).
    egg noodles
    pace picante sauce.
    or
    2 week old hot dogs

    my mother just got her recipes out of better homes and gardens recipe book (when she cared), otherwise it was spaghetti with cheap powdered spaghetti sauce. burritos made with hamburger, can of refried beans, velveeta cheese, and enchilada sauce. "shepherds pie", whatever was in the food box, or whatever I cooked cause she just gave up after the divorce.

  17. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    1 ass hole (wiped)
    1 6.2 inch cock (erect)
    1 liter of ky jelly

    With gloved finger, use jelly to thoroughly lube ass hole. Lube cock with leftover. Insert cock into ass hole. Thrust vigorously until ejaculation.

  18. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Nana's recipes die with me! *alalalalalallala*

  19. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    Peel and boil some potatoes
    Thaw and heat some frozen spinach in the microwave
    Hard boil one egg per person

    And better act like you like it

  20. 1 month ago
    Anonymous

    i haven't made it yet but when i get some extra food to experiment with i'm sure it will be good.

    Cheesy Chicken SouthWest Pot Pie (basically the filling from Chili's SW eggroll but in a pot pie so i don't have to fuck around with wrapping and deep frying )

    2 cups cooked chicken* (shredded or chopped)
    1 cup corn (drained and rinsed)
    1 cup black beans (drained and rinsed)
    1 cup spinach (chopped)
    1 cup diced red bell pepper
    1/4 cup diced jalapeno de-seeded
    1/2 TBS cumin
    1/2 TBS chili powder
    1 tsp salt
    1/4 tsp black pepper
    2 cups Monterey jack cheese

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