>coworker brings MREs every other day for lunch
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>coworker brings MREs every other day for lunch
>coworker brings MREs every other day for lunch
It's All Fucked Shirt $22.14 |
Nothing Ever Happens Shirt $21.68 |
It's All Fucked Shirt $22.14 |
What do their shits smell like?
Who knows, if he's eating MREs that often, the dude hasn't taken a shit in years.
it's an incel, isn't it
Not OP, but I bet it is, it has to be
OP here, he actually has a wife and kid. IDK I think he just has bad taste. He's fat and eats a lot, and I've never seen someone eat so fast. Like on a company lunch he ate a whole ass steak in two minutes.
>fat
>eats super fast
>weird autistic food picks
This guy definitely has some kind of insanely brutal trauma driven food anxiety
My dad brought home like 100 expired mres and I ate them for lunched at school, I started gaining weight and feeling like shit that's when my dad pointed out there's like 2400 calories in each pack, packed with sugar and fat.
Shit I need to MREmax then
i was at the surplus store a couple days ago and they were selling MREs for $10 ea and a disgusting 400 pound man thought it was $10 a case. it was pretty funny but then he waddled his way to put the case back which was decent of him so I felt bad.
lol, thank u for sharing, it's probably a good thing that big fat person didn't end up with a crate of mre's
A sewer would leave a body, now the wise man uses a wood chipper.
Just feed em to pigs
this tool i got will loosen up ya stool a lot
yea the pee pee will make you poo poo a lot
mmkay, 'sget this out on a tray
nice
some stuff in those packs tastes really decadent
That is a bit odd unless your job is in the military
Some homosexuals like to play pretend.
Mres use to have a shelf life of 10-20+ years, now its more like 5. Therefore, government releases near-expired mres to resellers all the time. theres also massive crates of the things floating around that are suppose to be handed by organizations like fema for emergnies who will also sell them if they feel like. During covid, my local winco was selling mres so clearly theres a major reseller that corporations have access to.
>mres arent legal to sell!
i think thats only true for soldiers trying to resell their rations. Ive literally seen them in regular stores before. Not thefake ones, but government issued.
> now its more like 5
Not even. The last time I bought one, the cake was moldy.
your coworker is a top bloke
More like a top gay!
you probably work with an operator. you should consider yourself lucky if the shit hits the fan there's a chance he might take pity on you and help you survive
I eat MREs when I go hiking on the weekends. Suck my dick homosexuals.
Yeah anon, hiking, in the woods, ie not at work
>tfw I bring sylta (head cheese) in for lunch often
I am him
That looks pretty weird, I wouldn't offer that to a stray cat and not be expected to be attacked.
Fyfan...
I am not a picky eater, but sylta is on my list of four things I don't eat.
Is he a vet?
Mostly likely not.
>drinks Black Rifle coffee
>wears nothing but olive drab or black, except when he's doing "gray man" which involves identical Old Navy ensembles and a starched hoodie
>open carries at Whole Foods
>signs his emails with "Semper Fi, stay frosty"
>anytime someone needs to open an Amazon box, he appears with an 18 inch karambit
>shares unwanted anecdotes beginning with "You know, back in Afghanistan..."
>but when pressed for details, he can "never talk about it"
>poops with the stall door open and pants completely off, "that's how we used to do it, you get used to it"
>has been called down to HR on multiple occasions for bullying the Sikh tech support guy
>pullups in the parking garage by his ridiculous lifted Jeep with 20,000watts of LED lamps and Punisher stickers
>volunteers to lead the floor Fire Drill team, has his own rank patch printed on Temu
sounds like your typical 80 IQ trump voter Tbh
how's that bidenflation working out for you homosexual?
you mean the inflation that trump caused from passing all those covid "recovery" bills totaling over a trillion dollars that just went into the pockets of fortune 500 companies? i barely notice it because i make 6 figures and save most of it, may be a little more impactful for minimum wage retail slaves like you
Nah, the "typical Trump voter" is just an average citizen who witnessed the last "social experiment"
(not that Trump will actually fix anything, he's a conman who's 8 figures deep in t-shirt sales and that train isn't stopping).
Probably went to Afghanistan to be a mechanic or something
>poops with the stall door open and pants completely off, "that's how we used to do it, you get used to it"
that's a power move right there
wtf i swear i've read these exact same posts here like a year or two ago
Probably the same 3 seething anons still b***hing about it years later
STOLEN VALOR
One time the military came to my small town for some training and they ended up leaving behind a whole bunch of MREs. I got ahold of a few of them and would eat them every so often when I didn't feel like making actual food. They were alright. I could see doing what your coworker is doing if I still had a whole bunch of them on hand and didn't want to make lunch for the next day.
Prepper preps for drama. Just eats mre because economically cheaper than buying lunch at current prices.
MREs are like $15 each. They are by far economical.
You said the opposite of what you wanted but this. MREs are insanely overpriced because of how the gov't supply chain sham works, the aftermarket is even more overpriced because they're technically not legal to resell, and the "civilian MRE" is even more overpriced because Alex Jones wants to gold-plate his skeleton like Wolverine. Actual soldiers are thankful the moment they can stop eating that constipating dehydrated preservative microplastic-laden shitballs, and return to eating Sysco Zogchow cooked by the metric fricke-tonne by a team of cholo hobbits, i.e. Real American Food.
Maybe it was purchased during a time of fuller wallet.
He drinks Black Rifle too, doesn't he?
I could actually find the Black Rifle clowns kind of funny if not for the dead-eyed serious boomer Facebook following. Not entirely sure how many levels of irony they are smoking, but at least somebody's making bank, along with the "Mission BBQ" israeli marketing pranksters making people stop eating and stand for the Pledge of Allegiance.
okay but mission bbq goes pretty hard. just don’t fricking stand when they play the anthem what’re they gonna do
>going fishing, happen to buy a black rifle company jacket at Bass pro because I forgot to grab one and it was by the register
>Occasionally wear it because jacket
>get compliments from boomers on it, explain I don't drink coffee and I just bought a random jacket
>usually end up having nice non political conversations
definitely felt like a gay wearing it though, I hated seeing their commercials on YT
All of the haters itt are overlooking the off chance that OP works with Dreamboat Steve..... in which case we should be asking for advice on maintaining those bulging biceps, perky pecs, adamantium abs, and luxurious locks, not to mention all the juicy bits he could get out onto a tray (NICE, with a musical medley as I tap the ash out of my crack pipe).
Steam works the noble profession of landscaping not whatever the hell OP is
Landscaping is just a cover story, occasionally he gets "activated" for deep cover black ops missions behind enemy lines. Most recently he was recruited to infiltrate Nintendo Japan, requiring him to learn fluent Japanese and undergo major plastic surgery, including the reduction of his natural 7'2" standard Aryan Chad height. It all has something to do with the next release of Super Smash Bros, and we do not expect him to post much MRE content until after the next E3.
MREs are expensive as hell
he has a job unlike you
Are MREs good for music festivals?
Why do people CHOOSE to eat MREs? Aren't they expensive, poorly tasting, and not that good for you? They're rations meant to soldiers so they prioritise cost effectiveness, longevity and ease of carry
>They're rations meant to soldiers so they prioritise cost effectiveness, longevity and ease of carry
There is another sinister reason for their properties.
When on base, soldiers eat "normal" food. Which is prepared in the base kitchen, or even American fast food outlets operating at the base.
But when away from base, they eat the MREs. The constipation inherent to MREs prevents the soldiers from having to shit or even get diarrhea while out on patrol or a mission. Imagine you're trying to get something done with 0 seconds to waste but then someone's got to take a shit. There's no time so he has to shit in his pants. Now one of the squad has poopy butt and won't be on his A game, plus he smells like shit.
This is actually why I eat MREs personally, though I just do it at home alone in order to not be visibly autistic. I just don't like shitting
I don't know what wars you've been to, but soldiers don't have to smell each other's butts like dogs.
>cost effectiveness
>military
Are you trying to weaponize gut-busting jokes?
They're minmaxing, the min is how much they spend on food for the troops and the max is how much they send to israel
Militaries have always focused on making rations cost effective or do I need to explain what these words mean to your or something. There’s a reason why the honest Tommy isn’t given fruit de mer with some champagne
>so they prioritize cost effectiveness
LOLOL!
They prioritize fat government contracts for whoever gets the greenlight.
Everything else you said was right.
LarpAss co-worker is what skilled survivalists/Preppers call "A Target" in a TEOTWAWKI kind of collapse.
The kind of guy who has thousands of dollars invested in supplies and food but it's all getting carried off in his poorly serviced "Tacticool 4 wheeler" by either the raiders or whoever finds his partially eaten by his own dog, cardiac arrest victim corpse.
There's at least one in every neighborhood. You can always spot them in a power outage, because they're the one with the loud ass gen-set running as they "Gloat" on the front porch for the next hour and a half with all the lights in the house on.
My coworker is a former military guy and his lunches usually consist of
>campbell's chunky soup eaten right of the can cold
>partially thawed frozen burritos, warmed up in the truck windshield if it's summer
>partially thawed frozen taquitos, same as above
>leftover pizza
We have a stash of MREs available at work and on his advice I took a few Chili and Macaroni ones, haven't tried one yet though. Keeping them for when the power goes out next winter
>coworker microwaves leftover fish for several minutes
Why would anybody voluntarily eat that shit is beyond me, it always gave me mad constipation and you'll feel like shit if you don't sweat all that sodium during the day. I'm not one of those gays who cares about stolen valor, but larping as a fricking grunt is peak moronation
those shits are not good for you, they're meant to cover your macros in broad strokes and might have a weeks worth of salt
Meds
Dr may have not reminded you to take them lately
>Dr may have not reminded you to take them lately
Benchod bastard
You used to be able to get cases of them for under $60 pre China flu. For like $5 a piece they are great to have for camping or backup or whatever. But they're like twice that price now so I don't buy them anymore.
there really is no reason to do this unless
A.you are in the military and have tons of these things left over from the field
or B. youre an attention prostitute.